LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT MYSELF

Because both Dad and Mom
Even the old midwife
In fact every single predictor
Bet that I'd be a boy
I tore out of the placenta determinedly a girl

Then
Because everybody regretted it
I became a boy
Then
Because everybody praised it
I became a girl
Then
Because everybody bullied me
I became a boy

When I came of age
Because my sweetheart was a boy
I had to be a girl
Then
Because everybody except my sweetheart
Talked about how I became a girl
I became a boy to everybody
Except to my sweetheart
Because I regretted being special to my sweetheart
I became a boy
Then because he said he wouldn't sleep with me
I became a girl

Meanwhile several centuries came to pass
This time
The poor caused a bloody revolution
And were being bossed around by a slice of bread
Therefore I became a medieval church
Saying love is the thing
I visited back alleys
Distributed old clothes and lumps of bread

Meanwhile several centuries came to pass
This time
God's land had come
And the rich and poor were great friends
So I hopped on a private helicopter
And scattered agitation leaflets

Meanwhile several centuries came to pass
This time
The bloody revolutionaries
Were kneeling before a rusted cross
I saw a fire of order in the disorder
So in the pub and in the den
Byron   Musset
Villon   Baudelaire
Hemingway   girls in black pants

And I played cared   drank
Talked nostalgically
About things like the libertines peculiar to the
Country in the East called Japan
And mainly
Made fun of things like
Simultaneity of love

Because both Dad and Mom
Even the old midwife
In fact everybody said I was a child prodigy
I was a cretin
Because everybody said I was a fool
I became an intellectual and set up residence somewhere behind
I didn't know what to do with my energy

When the rumor became widespread
That I was an intellectual somewhere behind
I began to walk out in the front
Was the same as my Dad and Mom's
I the pervert was confused
Was tormented because my reputation was at stake
And so
I became a good solid girl
I became a boy to my sweetheart
And wouldn't allow him to complain

Tomioka Taeko 1935-
From The Poetry of Postwar Japan, Ed. Kijima Hajime, University of Iowa Press, p 223-225